In case anyone missed it, last night was Festivus.

Every year, my friend Dan and his family hold a gathering of their family and friends to celebrate the Seinfeldian holiday, now five years running.

Among the various Seinfeld-themed elements to the evening is the board where we air our grievances. In case you can’t quite make it out, mine is in the bottom left corner and reads, “Lucas Wagner and David Johnston for not shaving so that I can just win this damn ‘stache competition!”

We hold the feats of strength — except instead of Dan trying to pin his dad, it usually involves some form of Seinfeld knowledge testing. Collectively, Dan and I, along with our friends Sean and Joel (more commonly known as “The Furious Four”) won the second round of episode matching and walked away with a free movie ticket each.

Also, slightly out of frame, I randomly selected a milk frother in the secret re-gift exchange. I am going to froth the shit out of so many things now.